my niece kadie doesn't like video games. we can't get her to play with us for the life of us. she will not play them at all...BUT WAIT oh she suddenly wants Call Of Duty. i don't get it. how does one who doesn't like video games wants to play COD? i mean, if you knew her, you would be thinking exactly what i'm thinking. deedee and bubbha told me she just wants it because everyone at school plays it. which sounds like something she would do. only because it's "popular" lol. honestly, the game itself...is okay. to me, it's only fun when you are playing with others. but i don't find it that great lol. i mean i love shooting games, but Resident Evil and other games like Tomb Raider and Uncharted are fun because they have great story lines. yep... i will wait til the day she actually plays that game. If my sister buys it for her, i think it will be a waste. My sister doesn't even really like that game and she's a game maniac lol. we'll see.

okay...so usually people say kwanghee and heechul are the girl dance pros, but clearly in this video it's siwan and kwanghee. siwan is so freaking into it that i never knew he was like this. and i love it haha. he needs to do girl dances more because he looks like a diva here. his facial expressions are priceless. minwoo looks cute here, tbh. he reminds me of taemin actually.... and heechul, he seems less into it than usual. maybe because it's not a SNSD song (that little snsd fanboy xD). omg though when they did Bad Girl, Good Girl laksalkdj. SIWAN WHY. omg alskdj. and then sikwang moment when kwanghee kept lifting his leg until siwan finally grabbed it xD i love these boys so much. would have been perfect if hyungshik was in it too, then it would have been my 5 favs :3

so i can beat this blind prison mini boss aka garrador in RE4. idk the other day, i was not expecting it to be like that and it scared me so bad, i had to turn the game off. I mean the zombies don't really scare me much anymore. the things that have scared me the most in the game so far is the masked chainsaw zombie, which they call Dr. Salvador. that will always scare me. then these guys, who some of them look like darth maul and they are called Zealots. the reason they scare me is because they like to whisper and chant and you can hear them from far away so you don't know where it's coming from and how close they are to you. and then the Garrador. he scares me so bad. i haven't touched the game in two days because of him. i wish i knew an easier way to kill him. if only i wasn't a chicken. this the first time i'm playing Resident Evil on my own. i usually play the two player ones but yeah. i don't have my broken butterfly gun i want because i didn't have enough money and when i went to go back to the merchant, the stupid zealots were right there so i ran away. UGH i want to play today, but i might just have to wait until my sister comes up and visits for two weeks. since she's a pro at this game lol.

so last night i spent all night till 2am playing Resident Evil. cuz i got RE4 for my birthday a year ago.... and i never played. mainly because when i first did, it seemed SO HARD to control. but i gave it another go and i love it actually. but it's so hard, especially the bosses. but that's what makes a game fun i guess though i get so frustrated. oh and they freaking put my favorite zombie in there. the masked chainsaw zombie. yes i'm being sarcastic. that is the only thing in this whole game series that scares the crap out of me. i remember when playing RE5 with my sister, and we did mercenaries and there's one level filled with those zombies and everytime i heard that chainsaw, it freaked me out. cuz you don't know where they are comig from. i'm sorry, i just do not like hearing that chainsaw coming and knowing he's going get you.  the executioner, yeah he was scary but not as scary as the masked chainsaw because you can hear that chainsaw running and it won't stop running until it's dead. and the way he kills you is just horrifying. and i was going down this road, with RE4, and all of a sudden i hear that chainsaw and i didn't even know it was in the game. so i was all like "NO NO NO. anyone but youuu." OTL. but i get two levels done, so far. yeah it's taking me a while but it's fun.
anyways, so yesterday was really hot and it was even hotter at work because of the kitchen and going in back and forth. hopefully today is a little bit better. i decided to sleep in the livingroom because it was too hot in my room especially it being upstairs. so that's what i did....and OTLOTLOTL idek what i was thinking this morning. I THOUGHT when i woke, I almost didn't wake up in time. and was thinking why didn't my alarm go off? cuz i remember setting it and turning it on ON. and so I got up immediately, JUST IN TIME, and took a shower. and after I blow dried my hair, my alarm goes off. and I'm all "omg did i just set my alarm for the wrong time. good thing i got up in time or I would have been late." and my mom was like "oh i would have woken you up later." and i told her that if she did, I would have been late. then she stops for a moment, looks at the clock and asks me "do you have to work at 11?...." and i'm just like "yeah.........*long pause and thinks* wait NO! i work at 12. omg."
so i basically woke up an hour earlier when i could have gotten more sleep ): i can't believe i did that. i don't even know what I was thinking this morning. sigh haha. so i'm sitting here, wasting time until i really have to get ready xD

joon why you gotta pick on him. joon asked everyone this question, when no one had no idea what he's talking about. and he turns to siwan and points to him, "YOU DON'T KNOW? *smirks*" some one is a proud babo. OTL and siwan is all "O___O" but laughing at the same time because he has no idea what is going on and he's the brain of ze:a. poor guy. i love my biases so much ;___; oh how wish so much that you two were best friends. i mean they share the same best friend. COME ON.
oh side note, i'd also love to see mir and hyungshik to be closer. they'd be perfect friends. i thought they were friends because on Idol United, mir helped hyungshik, who got injured, and pushed him around in the injured chair ;__; but they don't follow each other on twitter. SO SAD I tell you.

o__o was a BIT thrown off by hyungshik because i didn't know he could sing like that. i mean i do know that he has an amazing voice but i didn't know his vocal range could do that. i am very very impressed. and plus, siwan looks flawless playing his violin, like always. ...but the girl, not so great. though i don't know her conditions or anythng, she could have had a bad throat that day. i don't know. i don't know if she's a good singer in general, but i do think they could have picked a female vocal with a stronger voice. ;)

she is so amazing. i just love her and her swag. all those little kpop girl "rappers" got nothing on her. her vocals are flawless and her rap is just swag. i wish i was just as talented as her. she can have so much charisma and be so fierce like it's nothing. there is a reason she is my idol :) <3

i just realized i ignored SiWan a few good times in the past. and it was most times when Joon was there too. I ignored him in Oh My School, thinking "who is this kid. oh he's in kwanghee's group." and I basically ignored him. then second time was Golden Fishery Radio Star. everytime he was talking, i was like "stop talking...i want joon to talk more ):" OMG I AM SO HORRIBLE ;________; and i've ignored him and all of ze:a in all those idol championships. like i laughed at him when he fell in the hurdle run and thought it was good for them cuz ze:a kept winning. i feel pretty apologetic towards him. that i have ignored someone so wonderful. and just because he did a drama, i noticed him. but it's not because he was in a drama i liked. it was because when he smiled and they did the special effects xD i was like wow, he's really handsome. and then his acting was really good.
i want to crawl into a hole now. i never did this to my other biases. ):

as much as i want to watch it because of siwan. but god.....hyuna & g.na annoy me so much in that show it's not even funny. i mean i don't even mind g.na! she's talented but wth, why do girls have to act like that just because a guy is with them. the stupid high pitch "cute" voice. it's gross and annoying when girls do that and that's all they do. i couldn't even watch 5 minutes of it :| they're all "awww you are so cute!!!" and not even acknowledging his true talents. he looked annoyed at first too. can't they act normal atleast? idk how fans like that. it's annoying. ugh i can't do it. just can't and i'm upset because i'm missing out on cute siwan stuff ):

to me, it's not independance day, IT'S ZE:A's COMEBACK.
this video though...is cute and adorable. hyungshik is all handsome but cute. minwoo, taehun and dongjun seem happy. heechul is being dorky. kevin looks tired. kwanghee! he lost weight, well that's what it looks like to me. (idk sometimes he looks skinny and sometimes his face looks chubby. kind of thinking he has what bom has) and....SIWAN...why ): you look so uninterested and tired. atleast smile. or something. ugh makes me sad. and it's sad that junyoung isn't in it. hope he's doing better.
but i'm pretty proud of them :) they're promoting is getting better and you know what makes me even prouder? they're doing free concerts all around korea before their comeback. and this is coming from a group who comes from a low budget company yet they still do these wonderful things for their fans.

really bad actually....and it's pissing me off that he's not and he probably won't. because Ailee is going to. okay, i think Ailee is talented, but the girl already was a booming star and is VERY highly recognized for her talents. same with JongSuk. WHY CAN'T SIWAN WIN? why is there such a small amount of ZE:A'S (ze:a fan name) out there. why? siwan has just boomed as an actor and is a really good rookie actor. just recently MC-ed. i'm not trying to be so biased but come on. i find these voting things so unfair sometimes, that's why i barely ever vote for things. i just think the professionals should do the processing and choosing. yeah it's cool you are going with the people's choice but sometimes the people's choice aren't fair and not right. i've been voting every day for siwan and ughh it frustrates me. i am very thankful and proud that he's even nominated... but it just would be so disappointing if he doesn't win ): i just wish i could get everyone i know to vote for him... though i'd feel so pushy. ;___; okay i'm gonna shut up now.

so much for respect. i mean how obvious do i have to be?
i hate it when people just keep dissing and saying shit about someone i like. so Katie, who is a close friend of mine, pissed me off the last time she came over. we both love ANTM and somehow got on the subject of All Stars and she was all "I want to freaking punch Lisa in the face. I hate her so much. she didn't deserve to win. She's obnoxious and a drunk." HA (katie is worse than her when it comes to alcohol OTL) and i was like "UM I LIKE HER. I'm glad she won." and she was like "why? i hate her. i want to punch her. if i met her in real life i would punch her so hard." i wanted to punch katie. like i get it. you don't like her. stop dragging it on and telling me, who really admires her. so much disrespect i tell you. she wanted Allison to win. she said "allison was the runner up, she should have won. not stupid lisa." BUT LISA, ALLISON & ANGELEA were final three. there was no runner up. UGHHHH. whatever, Lisa won and that's all that matters. she can't change that. she just needs to shut her freaking mouth about it around me or i will just bluntly tell her to shut up and give some respect cuz i was really about to blow if she spoke any more. ;___; oh pisses me off so much. and she wanted Laura to win this season..NO. no laura but i kept it to myself. all i said is there is just something about her i don't really care for. but hehe lovely Sophie won <3 i love her too. she's adorable, sweet, goofy and loves pink ~

all the songs they did were both great BUT IN THE JUNGLE was freaking perfect. from Kwanghee's aweembowep (which SiWan looked so encouraging towards him. SIKWANG :3) to Kevin's perfect vocals. most perfect cover. i like that they chose that kind of song to do too. and i love true live accapellas. my unique empire boys :)
okay last post for today. goooodnight.

when i went on naver to check up on hyuksoo today, i literally froze. i was like "AM I READING THINGS WRONG?" "AM I DREAMING AGAIN?" i see all these articles in the news section....HyukSoo on Strong Heart. STRONG HEART. A VARIETY SHOW. i literally freaked out and hunted that episode down. you may think i'm over reacting, but HyukSoo doesn't do variety shows. I've always wondered about him going on them and I actually thought that Strong Heart would be the first one he'd go on because it's more of a sit down and talk variety and I WAS RIGHT. It's not really his thing to do varieties because he's very quite and shy when it comes to that kind of interaction. Interviews with a bunch of people, he's a tad bit shy and gets nervous. Personal interviews he does well. But show like this, wow can I say I'm a bit proud? Though he didn't get much camera time nor much talk time. I am just happy he got to be on the show AND i think ShinDongYup, who was his co-star in vampire idol, might have had something to do with it :) HyukSoo was a little bit nervous, i could tell. Even LeeDongWook asked HyukSoo why he wasn't talking much. XD but he did his best and he smiled alot. and like i said before, i am extremely proud of him. i sometimes feel like i'm like his mother or something. watching him grow into something wonderful and being so proud of everything he has accomplished over the passed years. i've been his fan for almost 4 years now, and it just amazes me how far he has come. he even was upto #8 on naver search engine today. i mean, i find that pretty damn amazing. i am overwhelmed with this and can't believe he was on it. but I'm not expecting him to do more variety because i know that's not his forte. i am completely happy with just today. that was enough. i mean he didn't even have to go on a show. i could care less, but i won't deny, the fan girl in me was giddy happy today :) i love seeing him shine so bright and smile and laugh. and interact with other celebrities. so proud of you, lee hyuk soo and always will be <3

like the things he does makes me think, wow he is so right. i've learned so much from him. people take him as a babo. i do too but only because i think he doesn't think before he talks. which results in him speaking gibberish lol. but on a serious note, he's not as stupid as people think he is. he is actually really smart with life choices. he works extremely hard for people to like him and to be known as a great singer. why does he do variety and act like that? for mblaq. he wants mblaq to be known, so he does those things for them. he already bought a house for his future. i don't freaking care if the other members say it's a piece of junk. at least he bought it and thought about his future. i once thought he was a scrooge, but finds out his money goes else where. to? his wonderful parents. why? because he said "my parents spent my childhood buying me things, giving me food and a roof over my head. i am so thankful and i feel the need to pay them back for what they have done." YOU MY DEAR, ARE SMART. WONDERFUL. you are such a perfect guy. the fact that you do that for your parents, i admire it. when i make alot of money, i'm going to do the same. they spent and did everything for me growing up. i need to return the favor. it only feels right. thankyou leechangsun, for being the wonderful human being you are.

you serious? SERIOUSLY? .... why are we so alike? that's one of my favorite pass time things to do. like i splurge on scrap book stuff everyonce in a while. i can just see it, pink themed house, pink pajamas, a room just for our fashionista clothes, scrap booking everything, embarrassing eachother in public with our clumsiness, he will wear insoles while i wear wedges so we can be taller, we can shuffle together and wth we can dye our hair pink too. ;_________; i thought my other biases were like me, but NOT LIKE SIWAN IS. waiting for the day where he hints he likes hello kitty..... there's nothing wrong with a guy liking hello kitty o_o
ughh i love this guy too much. idek anymore.

like right now, i'd be extremely bored if it wasn't for ze:a. because i'm still KIND of "new" to them, i still have yet so many pictures to look up and stuff and it keeps me occupied lol. if i wasn't then, i don't even know what to do right now. since my other bias groups, i have every picture and watched everything over 5 times already.
but beside that point, i feel like this is the only place i can rant about my love for ze:a. the only friend i have that even loves ze:a as much as me is probably deedee. i think...aika likes them but idk. :| sigh i need more ze:a friends but oh well i guess. i will just keep my ranting here until i see deedee again which is next weekend 8D but sadly she can't come back to my house with me cuz she has her other aunt's wedding to go to (her step dad's side. not our side xD) so maybe next time i go down, she can. which her sister (my other niece) might come up as well...WHOOPIE.... not really lol. not that i don't love her but um...she's kind of a spoiled brat and really bossy. though there are times where she's cool and fun to be around with. but she might get bored like last summer since me and deedee spend our time on tumblr and just talkin bout our boys lol.

ugh anyways,while i'm laying in bed listening to ze:a over and over again, i'm going to go and continue my picture hunting.

 these guys are just a bunch of dorks. i don't know what's more sillier, the fact that hyungshik is REALLY into his dino character or the fact that as a practice video, i've never heard a group so loud orz. then on the side, taehun & heechul just laugh at how silly their members are. siwan's chicken pj's are way too big for him xD. minwoo loses his shoe and kevin kicks it yelling "SHINBAL(shoe)!" OTL these kids i love them.